VICTIM TO VICTOR: AN ABUSE SURVIVORS GUIDE TO VICTORIOUS LIVING IN CHRIST


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And the heart and the gut intestines also have cells similar to brain cells, from what I have read. It is chilling to think about psychopaths scanning for people with empathy and the more empathy the better. Jimmy Hinton says that his father John a convicted pedophile , told him that when he John was in a room of people he could always tell who the other pedophiles were by watching their eyes and seeing where and how they looked at other people. You can read more about Jimmy Hinton here.

I often think about the Hinton family and what they endured.

And what they have shared, trying to encourage and educate others. Thank you for bringing them up. Their story is truly remarkable. Psychopathy is the common link.

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Let all genuine Christians take note: The very qualities Christian women are encouraged to cultivate are the very qualities that are most attractive to abusive men. And then the Churchians betray not only the victim, who is following Christ, but their own Christianity when they support the evil in their midst.

Thanks James. Your comment prompted me to look at Matthew Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in your name, and in your name have cast out devils, and in your name done many miracles? And then I will declare to them that I never knew them. Depart from me, ye workers of iniquity! Whosoever hears these sayings of mine and does them, I will liken him to a wise man who built his house on a rock. And much rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat upon that same house; and it did not fall, because it was grounded on the rock.

And whosoever hears these sayings of mine and does them not shall be likened to a foolish man who built his house upon the sand. And much rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat upon that house, and it fell. And great was the fall of it.

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And it came to pass that when Jesus had ended these sayings, the people were astonished at his instruction. I am very familiar with her work. This entire assumption is wrong. In an abusive a marriage, the woman needs validation and clarity, not more self-reflection and trying to be a better Christian. The whole assumption that a victim can change the marriage is dangerous and false. Because Leslie starts with this faulty assumption, her advice gets convoluted and confusing when she talks about putting it into practice —because it is impossible.

Victims need clarity and truth and Leslie brings false hope and confusion. Leslie would do well to expand her education about abuse by reading the experts this blog promotes. More confusion. As others have said, she quotes the Bible a lot but leaves out references that will bring clarity- such as the hundreds of scriptures on how we are to relate to wickedness.

The confusion, error and incompleteness of her teaching just goes on and on. My apologies for the lengthy delay in moderating your comment, HisBeloved. Yes, HisBeloved, your comment is certainly not spam, as stated by Reaching Out in moderating. I am very appreciative of the comments here that bring clarity to dilemma situations. I want the money and time back that I spent on these. I guess it is good to be aware of these types of works so that I can give others my reviews of them and offer better resources if needed.

I think any teaching should be viewed cautiously and challenged for clarification if needed. They may offer patronizing meetings and those, too, ought to be approached with good self-care. That is so unlike Jesus, it seems to me, to not invite questions and conversation. This site, refreshingly, refers to the danger and damage of mixed messaging and unbalanced teaching. My mind keeps thinking of a Christian counselor who referred to how many people it took to help bring one lost sheep closer to God…..

And at the same time not use their influence and power to help with support needs abused spouses may have when they choose to divorce or separate. It makes me sick. I keep noticing over and over again how victims of abuse tend to hold on for as long as possible—-as long as there is even a faint glimmer of hope for their marriage.

Victim to Victor : An Abuse Survivor's Guide to Victorious Living in Christ | eBay

Abuse is murder—it does not add to your life. It takes it away. I truly do understand why it might take so long for victims to leave, if they are able and willing to do that. It is simply crushing to come to such a drastic, but necessary conclusion. So I never knew where my personal faults were at work, and where I was simply reacting to the abuse.

For example, I might instinctively but incorrectly lash out at someone if they said or did something that reminded me of my abuse. But did the abuse exacerbate an anger issue I already had, or did the abuse simply add to it—or was I angry solely because of the abuse? Had I been a passive, peaceful-type person, would the abuse have been less intense, or less severe? I have often wondered what kind of a person I would have been had I not been abused. When you are abused, it takes over you in a pretty heavy way. I resented that it seemed to define me, rather than the other way around.

Bottom line is this: everyone emerges from abuse with issues to deal with. This sounds sort of lame and simplistic—-but let the Lord guide you as this is all worked out. No matter what—you did not choose to be abused, your abuser chose to abuse you.

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Testing my faith so that it would become as pure gold. If I could stand what he gave me, would that not strengthen me and give me stamina for future trials? Would I be more trusting of Him, seeing how He kept giving me the endurance I needed to survive? I am not sure, but I wonder if this is the sort of narrative that Leslie might have in mind? This is not how the Lord is, how He works, and what He wills for us.

And while I believe the Lord can certainly hold you together while you live with an abuser, that is not His plan for your entire life. If you are still there, that is your choice. But I stick to my words—-that is not what Christ wants for His beloved children. Barb and Reaching Out can decide if this portion is okay to publish. The message of salvation is glorious for so many reasons—-but one of the strongest and most simple parts of it and often hardest to grasp —is realizing that we cannot save ourselves apart from Him.

We cannot change ourselves apart from Him—-and all the desires and even good intentions cannot do what He alone can do. I remember so badly wanting to change—to be a better person and a good girl so that others would love and accept me. I tried to change my outward behaviors or at least give off an outward appearance of good behavior!

But none of it stood the test of time, and none of it was real.

2019 SNAP Conference -- Bill Jenkins; From Victim to Victor: Trauma Survivors Under Siege

I cannot stress how much I wanted to be a different person, but I kept trying and trying to do so by my own efforts. If you can, bring to mind what the Lord did in you to realize that you needed to be born again in Him in order to truly live, and be free from your sins. Since that time, any change within me has been a work of Him.

He taught everything I know. Any fruit He has borne, any good deed He planned and executed through me is all because of who He is, not who I am. Yes, I had believers around me before and after I was saved. But none of them, not one of them—-did anything else but set a good example for me, and encouraged me to seek Him.

They did not do any of the work within me that only He could do, to actually change and grow me in Him. That they were able to control them. As I see it, that is blasphemous. How dare anyone try to insinuate or flat out state such an impossibility?


  • Abuse Tracker: March Archives.
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  • Transforming This Generation.

And by the way—abusers are the King Kong of control freaks. They live to control and dominate and intimidate and gain all the power over their victims. This is evil. And abusers DO change their victims—but for the worse—causing fear and pain and misery. Victims might allow themselves to be controlled by their abusers in order to survive, but this is not how the Lord planned or designed relationships to be like! And I must point this out—abusers may believe they are very powerful and in control and they can be.

VICTIM TO VICTOR: AN ABUSE SURVIVORS GUIDE TO VICTORIOUS LIVING IN CHRIST VICTIM TO VICTOR: AN ABUSE SURVIVORS GUIDE TO VICTORIOUS LIVING IN CHRIST
VICTIM TO VICTOR: AN ABUSE SURVIVORS GUIDE TO VICTORIOUS LIVING IN CHRIST VICTIM TO VICTOR: AN ABUSE SURVIVORS GUIDE TO VICTORIOUS LIVING IN CHRIST
VICTIM TO VICTOR: AN ABUSE SURVIVORS GUIDE TO VICTORIOUS LIVING IN CHRIST VICTIM TO VICTOR: AN ABUSE SURVIVORS GUIDE TO VICTORIOUS LIVING IN CHRIST
VICTIM TO VICTOR: AN ABUSE SURVIVORS GUIDE TO VICTORIOUS LIVING IN CHRIST VICTIM TO VICTOR: AN ABUSE SURVIVORS GUIDE TO VICTORIOUS LIVING IN CHRIST
VICTIM TO VICTOR: AN ABUSE SURVIVORS GUIDE TO VICTORIOUS LIVING IN CHRIST VICTIM TO VICTOR: AN ABUSE SURVIVORS GUIDE TO VICTORIOUS LIVING IN CHRIST
VICTIM TO VICTOR: AN ABUSE SURVIVORS GUIDE TO VICTORIOUS LIVING IN CHRIST VICTIM TO VICTOR: AN ABUSE SURVIVORS GUIDE TO VICTORIOUS LIVING IN CHRIST
VICTIM TO VICTOR: AN ABUSE SURVIVORS GUIDE TO VICTORIOUS LIVING IN CHRIST VICTIM TO VICTOR: AN ABUSE SURVIVORS GUIDE TO VICTORIOUS LIVING IN CHRIST
VICTIM TO VICTOR: AN ABUSE SURVIVORS GUIDE TO VICTORIOUS LIVING IN CHRIST VICTIM TO VICTOR: AN ABUSE SURVIVORS GUIDE TO VICTORIOUS LIVING IN CHRIST

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